On May 23, 2012 by Shark

Reader QC posts an illustrious example of an Alpha move that ties in well with the previous post.


If you have time for a monogamous relationship during your peak years, the chances that your relationship will be fulfilling is minimal. That may sound somewhat enigmatic, but the concept is fairly obvious. If you are consumed by an impending mission in life, you introduce an opportunity cost to your minutes. If you “do not have time” for a monogamous relationship, then to pursue one, you must make time. You must sacrifice hours of productivity to be salvaged for love. Without a mutual understanding that you are sacrificing SOMETHING for your relationship, both sides take it for granted. How she feels has already been elaborated in the last post, but the benefit extends to you. When you are under screeching pressure from your self to pursue a higher level of achievement; you begin to constantly appraise the value of your relationship and compare it to the value of your time.

The idea of entertaining a long distance relationship where you’re constantly anxious if she might be cheating? Gone.

The thought of maintaining a relationship where secks comes once in a while in the form of pussy payments traded for good behavior? Gone.

The chances that you’ll try and rush things with a girl because you want to desperately establish exclusivity? Gone.

As proclaimed over and over again; live your life the right away and everything else will fall into place.


But the article brings up another point, can you maintain a monogamous relationship while you’re young and bent on glory? Every minute spent towards the relationship is a minute that could’ve been spent towards your goal. He who sacrifices his conscience to ambition burns the picture to obtain the ashes. And it’s not even the hour glass you need be worried about, it’s the frustration and mental focus that every monogamous relationship demands. The slight obstructions to your trajectory, the minor blows to your halcyon state of mind.

The media complex around the “lonely successful bachelor myth” needs to be dissolved. The bullshit is baffling. Every other movie and song is about a man achieving success only to realize that a family would’ve been more worth it. The two are often portrayed as mutually exclusive, when they are not. You can just as well get married when you’re 35 to a girl in her 20s as you could in your own 20s. Likely under better circumstance, with more experience, and after you are well established. I’d like to see all the guys who have been divorced or lead shitty marriages get together for a callabo and do a song on how pursuing women over your dreams fuckin sucks. In fact, I’d be willing to sponsor it. This rush to settle down out of a fear of loneliness needs to be squashed. The impulse to sacrifice your own dreams for security in the form of a monogamous relationship needs to be killed.




18 Responses to “Bolt”

  • E

    My Dad always used to say ‘unsuccessful men chase women, women chase successful men’. The words are ingrained in the back of my head till this day. Peace and love from London yo.

  • hey

    existentialist logic like this never stops getting confirmed

    her clientele could have learned a thing or two from you

  • Falcon Carter

    Well fucking said!

  • James


    shark, from ur posts i find that u HATE fat girls/ugly girls, from ur posts what i see is that indirectly ur always telling us to becareful not to end up with a fat or ugly chicks. i know i hate fat bitches or ugly cuz fucking mean but whats ur view ? whats ur reason for disciminating them. on that note, the other day i was dressed up very nicely, got IOIs from HB DDF BUSTY 10s, day was g8 until a fat chick come and sat right next to me on bus, (idk why, but now everytime i see fat girl or an ugly girl i tell myself, shark said not to talk to them, shark said they are mean and we can insult them to the fullest, OH LOOK THERES A FAT CHICK, RUN FOR UR LIFE) anyways this fat bitch, was giving me that pity look, like im a cockroach etc, i felt like i wanted to liposuck that bitch.

    in my life currently there are 2 ugly girls, when i say ugly ones like FUCKING BURNED VICTIM UGLY, another one is blonde, tall skinny ugly, im good friends with the blonde skiiny ugly, she is a nice person, cooks me food, i like her.
    but the other ugly girl that burned faced boycut hair, ugly ugly who if i’ve ever given a chance weather i’d fuck a dog or her id pick the dog in a heartbeat. she treats me like shit, i recently added her in fb (JUST FOR HUMANITY REASON CUZ I WAS TRYING TO BE NICE) she didnt accept my friend request, i just wanted to say ugly bitches say no more.


    • blowart

      didn’t read your post beyond fat girls

      fat girls pour FAT drinks
      so always find the fat bartender
      tip + one thousand points

  • Necorochi

    What a G, such a good positive role model.
    Work before flirt
    Money over Bitchez
    Business before pleasure

  • tony

    “This rush to settle down out of a fear of loneliness needs to be squashed. The impulse to sacrifice your own dreams for security in the form of a monogamous relationship needs to be killed”

    my problem, regarding this, is the dream. i dont know what to do, what to make my goal. and im unsure how to find it.

    im 20, have an A.A.S. in automotive science. i dont feel like a job in the automotive field (if i stayed with this field i’d get a bachelors and go into engineering or creation of my own business) is really meaningful. maybe it could be, but im unsure. not to mention its a sausage-fest of a career choice. every damned class is 100% male, same with the dealership i worked at.

    my dad is a self employed entrepreneur and makes plenty, but he was never really around for me.

    ive spent plent of time this last week or so thinking about what i should make my goal. what i should do in life, what my purpose is/will be. and then i read a quote from a book im sure you are plenty familiar with: “if you’re a male and christian and living in america,your father is your model for god. and if you never know your father, or he bails and or dies or is never home, what do you belive about god? … So what you end up doing, is you spend your life searching for a father and god”

    so i considered that being a potential reason from my lack of a goal. im not religous, so i think about this quote replacing the word god with purpose.

    all i really have right now is a short term goal, which is to enter an amateur cage fight. im training 3hrs a day for that. besides that the only thing im working on long term that i feel actually had a good purpose is my physique. i feel that i have such potential, and i yearn for eventual greatness, but im lacking the crucial component of direction. im willing and wanting to give 100%, but like with automotive im just unsure if that is a path deserving all my dedication.

    any wisdom that may shed light on my situation would be greatly appreciated.

  • Trey POUND

    Shark, the recent posts were golden. Your ability to answer comments with such knowledge over game has really opened my eyes.

    I have been talking to this girl for about 6 months now, we have not had sex. I feel the attraction is strong. She knows I have other options. I start to give her less and less attention. About a month ago she Blackberry messages me during class, a pretty pointless message. I take this as an indicator of wanting to have a conversation, since my attention towards her was slowly declining. I give her a compliance test in which she denies to do. Usually she is very submissive and does things like this for me. By not giving in to the compliance test she elicited an emotional response from me. I BBM’d her saying “Fuck you.” (Yes I know this might have been a pretty ‘beta’ move on my part) She then deletes me off Blackberry messenger. Since then I have not texted her (with her real number) or talked to her, but I see her at least 5 times a week from school. I gave her about 4 and half weeks of no contact and sent her a non sequitur text (with her real number) that had nothing to do with her, but rather information about the school community. (And I truly have lost a lot of interest in her during the 4 weeks and texted her solely for information over anything) She does not reply. This increases my attraction for her (Since we want what we cannot have). I do not see her in school for the remaining 2 days of the week. On that Friday she texts my best friend for the first time in months, who does not go to the same school as us. On top of that he has a girlfriend much hotter than this girl in question who he has been with for a while now 5+ years.This information gets back to me by him of course.

    The following weekend I enter the restaurant where she works. I order, (not from her) but she notices me there and notices that I do not look at her. (I can see her looking at me from the corner of my eye) I grab my food and leave. This may be somewhat a self-affirmation since she did not reply to my text; I want to show that it did not affect me. (I know, by wanting to show her that it did not affect me, it did affect me) Now I’d still like to fuck this girl, but I know I can TRULY MOVE ON if that is what is needed to conquer more of my beta self. You may not believe me since I’m writing this situation to you but I do it for more knowledge and how to handle situations like this better in the future without having someone tell me what to do step by step.

    Now my question for you is should I keep no contact up? Do you think she will try and contact me if I continue with no contact? Should I keep progressing with my other options and totally forget about this girl? She probably wants to turn me into a beta obiter but I know for sure that will not happen. Could you enlighten me on the situation and what is going on in her mind for my better understanding of woman? Thank you.

    • hey

      Now my question for you is should I keep no contact up?

      yes. how could you possibly contact her without showing your true needy self?

      Do you think she will try and contact me if I continue with no contact?

      nobody on here knows enough about the girl and her perception of you to make a reliable, usable guess. for all we know she could see you as a complete joke who doesnt have the balls to fuck, or she could be playing the same game you’re playing with this attracted-but-not-contacting business

      Should I keep progressing with my other options and totally forget about this girl?

      yes, always

      Could you enlighten me on the situation and what is going on in her mind for my better understanding of woman?

      the main problem sounds like she doesnt see you as the physical and sexual being that you are deep inside you. you hid that part away from her for 6 long months, which is unacceptable. in general, women like it when guys they like touch them as much as possible (with the right timing and setting and whatnot, of course), because touching alludes to sex and girls like having sex with guys they are attracted to. by touch, i mean anything from a covert arm brush to a hug. all forms of touch have a certain degree of sexual air to them, so use that to your advantage. it can be awkward touching a girl at first, but once you get the hang of it, it gets to be fun, easy, and most of all: natural (congruent to your true self, not hindered by any fear of coming off as weird). just touch girls and see how they react; change your methods if they aren’t working/can obviously be improved on

    • DJR

      I’d just go nc and go get myself another woman, don’t reply if she messages/calls for at least 4 weeks. Refer to the article on no contact a page or two back. Let go and you’ll be right.

  • Nick

    Shark, please check this article:

    A popular Comic book character being turned gay, Is this a marketing campaign or is it something bigger?
    Just think a kid reading comic books and his favorite super hero is now gay isn’t that like an anchor point that can subconsciously affect him/her. . . now multiply this anchor on millions of kids. . . #F**K the matrix.

  • Melqart

    How do you balance pseudo-time and realtime (words – internet – text – play VS. actual being where/what/why one is doing/saying/being accordingly)?

    What’s your take on Gilles Deleuze?

    Who wins: Isaac (ben Solomon) Luria Ashkenazi, Kennedy, or John Dee?


  • Ian

    Shark, I’d really like to see if you can tell me what I’m dealing with here. I’ve read this site top to bottom and learned a lot about where I’ve gone wrong but I can not figure this one out.

    After 3+ years together we broke up a couple of months ago. I didn’t want that and of course I overreacted a little when it happened. Once I got my shit together I went no contact and within 48 hours she was calling and texting asking me to come over and see her. Sex… lots of sex. Almost every night since then. She wants to hang out other times too. She says she loves that our humor meshes, we like the same stuff, etc. Once in a while she will say things like “you’re so awesome… you almost make me want to date you again”, “you almost make me fall in love with you when you do ______”, “I love you… I mean… in a friend sort of way” or “maybe we will visit ______ next year… if we are together…”. I play it cool and act like I don’t care. The less I seem to care the more she seems to do this.

    Now for the part that is confusing me. A few night ago we are getting frisky and talking dirty about having a three-way with another chick. Nobody in particular, just some fantasy she told me about months ago. It really turns her on when we talk about it, but after we finished and were lying there in bed, she starts talking about how it was really hot talking about another chick but how I shouldn’t kiss her and try to be romantic when we talk about that. Her reasoning being that she can’t think of me in terms of someone she wants to have a future with as well as someone who would have a three-way with her and another girl. Apparently this fantasy is a great turn-on for her but when I participate she sees me as just someone to have sex with, not as a long-term option. This came up after weeks of her being incredibly flirty and sweet with me, and just a couple of days before she had talked briefly about possibly wanting to get back with me in the not too distant future. I indicated at one point that I would like to be with her again in the future but I didn’t push it and I didn’t get mushy… it was just a quick comment and completely in context when I said it.

    Maybe she’s getting with someone else or looking at other options, right? I would think that too, except that I am with her literally every night. Essentially, any time she’s not at work we are together. She constantly throws little compliments my way, seeks my approval, tells me she tries to look good for me, so this is why I’m turned around on this one. It seemed like my laconic attitude was working. She was trying to monopolize my attention, working hard for it, talking about a future… now as of a couple of days ago she is back to telling me that she doesn’t see a future with me and she doesn’t want to start over and date me again. Never mind the fact that what we do now is exactly the same as when we were dating, if not better… but of course she would never admit that.

    What do I need to do here? I have not been applying NC at all really since the very beginning, and even then it was brief. Typically I do let her contact me and I don’t respond instantly, and I let her call me after work to invite me over. I went on a couple of dates with another girl but never told her about it because I didn’t want to instigate some sort of revenge on her part. She did get pretty insanely jealous about an email than another Ex sent me, so I can see the effect that another girl liking me could have on the situation I’m just afraid to apply it since this girl gets hit on by every guy who crosses her path.

    Is it possible that she is just enjoying this feeling of independence, even if it is mostly and illusion? Maybe she wants to be chased and she got frustrated with me not chasing her? The day after the three-way conversation she still texted and called me at work and even invited me over that night, so she’s still interested on some level but I just can’t read this situation.

  • How would you handle a girl who makes the first move way too soon? Its just creepy!

  • Ron

    Don’t sign. Period ! The Ocean wishes to Keep you Happy……Keep the Ocean Happy !!!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>