Explaining Game

On May 21, 2012 by Shark

Dear Shark-All-Mighty

your blog, your book, your advice, your words, have changed mine eyes forever. And with everything I learned, I keep wanting to explain it to other people, especially girls. It seems impossible to me that they can’t understand it because its so plainly true and obvious. Can you explain game to a girl, should you even try? How can it be refuted when its so clearly obvious?


Yes and no. If you tinge on a deep enough truth, you may hit a chord of empathy, but it will not be the type of implicative understanding you yourself have gone through. You might be able to explain to a girl why she feels a certain why, and she may understand it, but it won’t change her perception of the situation nor how she reacts to it. For instance, I tell you “You want to pump and dump your ex-girlfriend because your ego seeks to be appeased.” You may then take that information and use it to allay your Oneitis and cut her loose, or pursue her on more genuine terms (*cough*). A girl will take it to understand herself better, but the chances are slim that it will alter the tilt of her decision. It will help more if it is already in accord with her decision or belief.

I have had variable success with online dating, although much more whilst utilizing the terrible secret I mentioned earlier. I post below, a conversation between me and one such character where I could not help but divulge my knowledge of her psyche after being struck by boredom. Keep in mind though, you should never discuss “game” with a girl. At most you may enlighten her about her own feelings to gather her reaction and amuse yourself.


Her: I like when you hold my hands tightly
Me: Why? Did your dad hold your hands tightly?
Her: lol what
Me: Is he the reason you like assholes?
Her: I do not
Me: You do, you’re probably getting turned on right because I even mentioned the word asshole and am not listening to anything else you say.
Her: Ew no
Me: Yes
Her: lol fine maybe a little
Me: Predictable
Her: I don’t know why I like assholes so much
Her: I hate when guys are too nice to me
Me: All girls like assholes genius, it’s in your bloodwork
Her: but why?
Me: You get bored of nice guys and hate them because they aren’t a challenge to you. Like all girls you only crave the things that run away from you, and will continue to do so until you get old and ugly in which case anything will be welcomed
Her: that’s a mean to put it
Me: I like how you used “mean” since “wrong” wouldn’t apply
Her: How do you know all this?
Me: Know all of what? I’m winging it dude, just guessing. Is this really how girls work?
Her: lol maybe.. is this why I like you?
Me: Yes, but I’m engaged, and I’m not very interested in you beyond having secks
her: that’s so wrong. I hate that im ok with that
Me: but you are, so why argue about it
Her: I wanna meet up
Me: Because we’re talking about assholes and me not caring about you, which happens to turn you on by eliciting the same emotions
Her: you’re too smart and you think too much
Me: you’re too dumb and you think too little, I’m trying to carry the team
Her: why am I ok with you saying something like that to me? I want to be able to fight back. My boyfriends have always treated me badly
Me: Because if you weren’t, it wouldn’t matter. Your mind is thinking “let me try and get him to love me first, THEN my theatrics will actually affect him”
Her: lol I actually love when you explain these things to me
Her: like I feel them but I cant explain them. You put them in words so easily
Me: symptoms of my genius
Her: You’re going to make a really good husband
Me: Or a shrink
Her: lol I love you <3
Me: Why?
Her: lol what?
Me: Try and answer, why?
Her: Because you’re smart and funny?
Me: Intelligence is only attractive to you if its accompanied by an asshole. You like guys who think they’re smarter than you, and who treat you dumber. How smart they actually are doesn’t matter
Her: lol maybe
Me: why did you say maybe?
Her: i don’t know
Me: Because no matter how hard you try, you can’t come to full terms with how you feel, and the reasons behind them
Her: I always wanted to have someone analyze me, but not my boyfriend
Me: I’m not your boyfriend
Her: ok w/e you are


It continued, but I have not the patience to type more of it. Notice how she says “you’ll make a good husband” while under the belief that I’m cheating on her while with my fiance. Should tell you everything you need to know about hypergamy, morality, and a girl’s standards.



18 Responses to “Explaining Game”

  • Paul

    how deep does the rabbit hole go?

  • Necorochi


  • Epic

    Hey Shark,

    So I have two girls going at once. They both know and like each other. We haven’t all slept together yet, but it’s pretty clear it’s headed that way. Only thing getting in the way it’s hard for all of us to be together at the same time due to logistics. I will make it happen. Anyways, my gut instinct tells me a harem is a possibility. One is more open to the idea, the other one (who is techincally the number 1 girl) Not so much.

    How can I go about this?

  • j

    Shark, two words: The Bachelorette. I decided to sit through an episode with my girlfriend, and I couldn’t help but laugh, but even more, feel bad for all of the men in society that are being brainwashed to supplicate for exclusivity with a woman of beauty. This show is the definition of the Matrix. Any thoughts on it?

  • Matt

    Awesome, this reminds me of something I have going on with a girl.

    Shark, could you please write a post on giving girl Drama in a relationship and how to deal with it.

  • Sim

    wow. i already knew all of that, but seeing it play out really makes me believe what i know. thanks shark.

  • This post speaks so much truth.

    Though I’m a girl, I have been working on learning about the game myself. I don’t know how I’ve come to it but I’ve chosen to take the red pill and unplug from the matrix. I can’t say how long and how hard I have tried to enlighten myself, but ever since I have stumbled upon sharks teachings, my life have never been the same too. (for the better)

    It’s so damn true that no matter how I try to find logical assumptions and rationalize with myself, we just can’t avoid nor shut down the females emotional side. It’s truly frustrating.

  • Anonymous A

    Dear Shark,

    You haven’t replied to my last stripper-story but that’s not going to keep me from writing again. You may have chalked it up to guy stuck with Oneitis, who knows? Hell, this one might even make you a little proud.

    I started getting a different dancer like you had advised. The new one’s probably a 9 in my eyes (obvious-looking butt implants) where the former is a 10. The 9 fished for my # the first night I got her, kept asking to go out and on her next day off I met up with her and fucked. Best of all… she didn’t even charge me for it! If you disregard the $55 for the room, that is. It really is amazing what a pre-selected status can do for you. All the strippers know about my history with the first dancer who recently on her day off busted into the VIP room of the club as I was getting dances from the new girl.

    Thing is… the new girl annoys the hell outta me! She’s a lousy liar and that makes her stripper game pretty transparent.

    Last week was my birthday. The 10 (former dancer) lets me know a week in advance that she has made dinner reservations and plans to take me out. I decide to go and take her up on the offer. We’re at this pretty expensive restaurant and everything’s fun in the beginning. A couple glasses of wine later, and we’re no longer able to avoid talking about our past. It turns out pretty ugly as I show her the pictures on my phone that started our entire falling-out. They were pictures of her and her “Ex” at a club party to which she still maintains that she was there for the purpose of promoting but didn’t have sex with him. It always amazes me how riled up she gets. She has very little control over her emotions at the slightest hint of accusation. It kinda mellowed out after that but I could still tell she was affected by it for the remainder of the night.

    She has to work after our dinner so I drop her off to get ready and we meet up at the club. We’re in the VIP and after a few dances she continues the heated discussion we had earlier during dinner. Her body language was interesting. She’s standing up with her bare feet pointing at me while I am sitting down. Her body language stayed open throughout. She’s pretty much going over the entire span of our relationship while explaining how her job is taking a toll on her, how she isn’t as good at expressing her feelings. She tries to assure me that she could do just fine without my financial help because… “I’m a hustler… this is what I do!” Her tone ranged from being frustrated => angry => hysterical => verge of tears. We’re cut short and it is nearly time for us to go. I try to reach for my wallet to pay her and she interrupts by giving me a really tight and long hug. I go for my wallet again and she grabs my face with both of her hands and pulls me in for a long kiss. At this point it really took everything I had to get a hold of my emotions and not break down. It was painful.

    She tells me not to pay her and we walk out. We take a seat among the crowd and she agrees to the argument I had made earlier about there not being any trust left between us. We talk some more and maybe through force of habit… I don’t even know why… I take the money out my wallet and give it to her. She is somewhat surprised but doesn’t hesitate to take it. While walking me out, she proposes to start over again without me buying her any more things.

    I was so pissed the next day that I ended up paying her when I didn’t have to. Why the fuck did I do that?

    She is supposed to take me to the mall and buy me more birthday presents so I’ve decided to leave her alone till she contacts me. It appears that she’s not willing to let me go that easily. I just wish I could read her better. She never talks about her father. All I know is that they’re not on good terms and that he stops by her work sometimes to ask for money. I wish I could know more about her childhood experiences to build up more rapport.

    Any tips on how to pump-and-dump (worst case scenario) this girl would be greatly appreciated. I can’t see another better way of moving on than that.

  • Al

    Can we have more posts like these?

  • Msam

    Mighty shark..

    How can one prevent himself from falling in the realm of intellectual masturbation ??

    • hey

      act on what you learn.. if youre told you can overcome your fear by approaching, go out and approach that very day. if you do this for every other thing youre taught, then soon enough you wont even feel the need to waste your time reading anything about game (“intellectually masturbating”) to live a happy life

    • Necorochi

      This isn’t intellectual masturbation, this is intellectual hardcore sex.

  • ANT


    I think it may just be safer to tell all of your readers to go ahead and NOT try to explain game, or anything related, to women. Sounds like most guys on here would mess it up horribly. After all, is it not counter productive? Not that I’m some guru or anything but most of us would be way too overt.

    I’d like to get you’re opinion on something if possible..

    I wrote you awhile back about a relationship, involving children, a super conservative cult like religion, etc. Anyway..it ran its course, got ugly, and we split. And I’m doing pretty good with it thanks to the wisdom I’ve gained here.

    Right now I’m gaming 3 women who know I’m the Alpha when it comes to my hobby. I do remember you mentioning, in a previous post, about women always being interested in the best at any given activity. Well I see it all the time… when they come in with their boyfriends. The mad wandering eye.

    I’m basically applying game and trying to learn as much as i can from interacting with these 3. The crazy thing is how different they are, yet how similar they are. Their ages are 24 (no kids), 33 (single mom), and 39 (single mom). I am 29 years old, but look 22, and I know I’m very attractive. But I know looks are just looks, and NEED to be a leader.

    Out of these three, the two youngest, act pretty nervous around..and they just dont seem to be ‘themselves’. The oldest, is the coolest, is ‘herself’ and just seems comfortable. I’ve made it clear (to all) that I’m not looking for a relationship, yet they ALL text first, escalate first, offer dates/plans first. I find myself WANTING to hang out with her…the other two..eh not so much. It’s more of a chore.

    My question is: What is making the oldest more comfortable around me? I feel like I’m gaming correctly and showing my Alphaness. Confidence. The reason I ask is because I KNOW she is used to being around Alphas all day. She’s an ex marine, works at the county jail as a tactical officer (so her peers are tough ass kicking dudes). She’s a tough chick. She also has a bunch of loser inmates to which I contrast (however I’m sure a bunch of them are alphas). I think I may have answered my own question by writing this.. if I acted like a pussy around her, good looks or not, I’d pale in comparison to her current peers. You’re opinion is appreciated.

  • ANT


    I know you touched on the Kardashian show back in December. But I recently saw that Kim Kardashian is dating Kanye West. I can’t help but wonder: What is she famous for? What did she accomplish in her life?

    Most importantly: What do you think this is teaching young girls?

  • T


    How do you make your ex regret her decision for the rest of her life, I’m sure a lot of guys reading this right now probably feel the same way as I do. I know the opposite of love is not hate its pure indifference but shit dude I just want to know how to make sure the guy she ends up with pales in comparsiion to me. Whether it was an LDR, whether there was betabackslidiing, whether you were desexaulized or not, whether you were in highschool, university or just working, whether she was your neighbor, a girl you went to school with, a girl you work with or someone you knew through a mutual friend. Whether your skinny, fat, built rich or not. I never betabackslided never said anything insecure, cut my losses right away, mine was an LDR so toxic it would make the air in chernobyl seem clean as fuck. I cut all contact and felt an imerse amount of pain and emptiness but never contacted my ex at all and ignored the one email she sent but I recently saw a picture of another man holding her on his lap and it f’d with my head so much, I mean this girl I thought would be the mother of my children at one point and I cant get this girl out of my head, the empty feeling I have it. Do I need to make a 100million dollars, gain some wieght (or lose weight if someone is fat) and have a torqued body and date super models? I hate this girl so much now, I mean how could we be so close at one point and I see her with someone else? Yes we didn’t talk for months, yes I ignored her one attempt to have some sort of friendship, she is gone for years and an LDR is like having an invisible GF, but another man? He’s tehre and I’m here we both decided not to be together although it was her choice 100% I just knew I couldn’t convince her to be with me so just dropped it. I don’t want her now that she is getting jack hammered by another guy, doing the dirty things I used to do to her but I want her to regret it and I dream of the day she calls me too see “how’s it going?” or when she comes back to the same country in a few years permantly, I hope she fuckign ages poorly. I know let it go, let it go but fuck shark I can’t. I don’t want to get her back, I don’t want to just do it too see if I can do it, I jsut want her to regret it. I’m in my late 20s, in the highest tax bracket in my country and super ambitions and want to eventually raise my own fund. But tell me wise one, you saved my life mulitiple times but I need your help again. I just want this slut of an ex to hate her decision, if its making a 100million I will do it, if its gettign ripped I will do it, if its to date a super model fuck I will do it. Do you have a list of things? I want her to hear about me, I want her kids to pick up a book one day and read about me, her to turn the TV on and see me hanging out with her fav rapper or her parents seeing me on some business network talking about the market and how I made a killing off it. I have external game like no1 could imagine but internally I have a lot of work I just realized. I haven’t eaten anything the last 2 and half of days and been throwing up, fucking pathetic I know but thank god this feelign is all hate not saddness, though I’m sure there both closely related when it first happened I was devasted shit I will admit it I was fucked out of my mind but never let any1 see me that way, ever, kept it all inside and used this blog as my only salavage if ppl knew I was this fucked it would surprise them. I have a lot to work on, I know. Shes not thinking about me, she is not typing to someone for help she isn’t and I am that makes me disgusted and when she crosses my mind every fuckign minute of every fuckign day its just not cool and all of this all happened once I saw her with another man, although I suspected something was going on but until you actually see it and its really there it fucks with your head like I can’t describe. Sucked the soul out of me and I want it back.

    • Necorochi

      What ever your dream or ambitions are, cut all the bullshit and make them happen.
      Become the best you can be at something.

      I recently started devoting my self to my dream of becoming an MMA fighter.
      Ever since shark posted ” http://www.solvemygirlproblems.com/2012/05/return/ ” he gave everyone a secret hopefully not overlooked.

      After hearing him talk about becoming a monk for a week to get his thoughts in order; figuring out you priorities, not only inspired me but I also tried it for my self.
      It’s Gold.

      Ever since last Friday I’v been meditating every morning to make sure I’m on the write track, maybe you don’t need to do it everyday like I do but my mind seems to get off track easily (Which I’m working on).
      I started stretching for at least 30 minutes every morning to get my high kicks back and be able to put my foot behind head for Ju-Sit-Su.
      I used to be able to do a split which is necessary if you want to be able to round house kick someone in the face.

      A practice long forgotten but will help me on my journey.

      I finish out high school this week and my dad said if I graduate and making nothing lower then a B he will pay for me to train at American Top Team an MMA gym that close to me until I go to book camp for the Marines august 7th, So I’ll be training all summer.

      I checked my on course online and I’m passing just my dad has to hold up his end of the deal.

      I understand exactly how you feel I’m going through something similar with my ex.
      Give substance to their fear.

      Through meditating I devised a plan, I’m going to stick with this plan through more meditating until it’s a subconscious effort.
      Since I like to use this blog as an outlet for my thoughts I’ll let you guys in on it; all of this can be found through shark’s articles.

      First, I’m going to stop hanging out with my friends, they don’t want me to succeed. I found out one of my close friends used beta game on one of the girl’s I was talking to to get her to de-sexualize me by saying “He’s weird” behind my back or something of that nature. Basically making her rationalize me being aloof and ignoring her, I wasn’t being weird, if you don’t have anything to say don’t say anything.

      Which WAS working I could clearly see her giving me way more IOI’s then him and I’m sure my friend caught glimpse of this because he was jealous and he resorted to beta game ( http://rationalmale.wordpress.com/2011/09/02/beta-game/ ) to amog me.

      Basically being a bitch and empathizing with her to get on her side. Basically shamming my behavior like a feminist would do. I thought she would look past it but I guess rationalizing it by saying “He’s weird” was more satisfying for her. Oh well her lose. Now the beta game did work for him but he didn’t have the game to keep it going about 2 week’s later I asked him what happened and he was like “She’s trippin”

      Mother fucker..

      Anyways’s I should have just stopped hanging out with him them then and their but I realized that he would put to and to together if I stopped hanging out with him around the time he pulled some shit like that. Instead I’v slowly stopped hanging out with my old friends slowly being un-noticed they are just beta haters that want to keep me down.

      This is fucked up but I’m a fucking Ninja so it’s ok. The reason why I didn’t stop becoming friends with him then and their is because you must never show that anything has phased you and also you don’t want the enemy to learn from their mistakes. Instead of making a big deal out of anything, if anyone fucks you over just make a note of it in your mind, don’t acknowledge their antic’s, let them keep acting beta, don’t let them learn from their mistakes, act like it didn’t happen and be covert like a Ninja.

      Next, I need to start making positive social proof. Don’t that drama hater shit.
      Once I start going to American Top Team I’m going to start making friends. People with similar interest. That’s the kind of social proof I should trying to build. Good friends with similar interests.
      Maybe I could meet a girl their that want’s to full mount me *WINK* WINK*

      Also, me writing this has made me realize I should start doing push up’s everyday again as well as taking a run.
      I’v been watching what I’v been eating lately. Portion control.

      Finally, that’s basically it. My periods of betaness are becoming shorter and shorter thanks to shark, you are a great teacher. I just have to be consistence with what I do. I doubt I will relapse into laziness again thanks to your meditation secret. That’s a great way to keep on track and anyone reading this should at least try it if your having issues staying on task. Not saying I was always off task before the “Return” post but not as on task as I should have been and compared to when I didn’t know about this blog, a hell of a difference, I truly have come a long way. I plan on going into to the UFC after I come back from the Marines, I’m looking forward to the challenge and welcoming their mind breaking tactics, I’m going to try to fully purge my betaness. The cool thing is all these goals are within my reach and I believe I can accomplish them. That’s my plan on how to become alpha/change my life around and my my ex regret breaking up with me during my beta prime but can I really blame her I was beta and she was hypergamous. Betabacksliding and hypergammy is to breakups as Cheech and Chong is to Marijuana.

      Fake it till you make it.

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